A small and effeminate boy—bullied for years while growing up in an alcoholic family in suburban Cleveland—Gil finds refuge in the equestrian world. A coach instills in him the dream of going to the Olympics and becomes his mentor, his guide—and his predator. Gil survives rape, betrayals, setbacks, and the loss of family and friends—all while on a quest to fulfill his dream. This book is not only about surviving; it's about the resilience of the human spirit and the pursuit of dreams against all odds. Gil makes it to the Olympics, but not in the way he imagined. He discovers what happens when a dream ends, and all you have left are your addictions. What does it take to finally realize that our lives can't go on as they are? How do we put an end to our self-destructive ways? Is it even possible to grasp the complexities of untreated and unrealized trauma? How do we come to terms with the cost of the abuse we suffered? Gil tells his story with a breadth of detail and thought-provoking insights rarely shared by male victims of sexual abuse. Readers will find a story of hope, determination, and the transformative power of confronting one's past.