Gordon is 56, married for 37 years, and has spent his whole life fixing other people's houses while quietly dying inside his own. Until one rainy lunch-break swipe changes everything. When a much younger man matches with the big, white-haired Scottish joiner, Gordon expects nothing more than a quick chat and a wank. What he gets is the kind of raw, loud, no-guilt fucking he's been craving since 1988. From denting the marital headboard to smashing it to splinters, from quiet hotel rooms to the inside of a thirty-foot steel Kelpie, Gordon discovers exactly how loud, how happy, and how filthy a man can be when he finally stops pretending. Zero guilt. Zero shame. Just pure, daft, grin-splitting joy and a lot of broken furniture. A loud, joyful, married-man breeding story with zero moralising and maximum Scottish swearing.